Yesterday I went shopping for clothes for the first time in years. I finally decided that sweatpants just are not acceptable attire in public anymore. I went to Target because I didn't want to spend alot of money on these clothes because of course they will only be transitional. When the REAL ME emerges many pounds lighter, then I will fork over the big bucks for a stylish wardrobe.For months now I have been avoiding mirrors. It's amazing how much you can delude yourself if you just don't LOOK. But when you are going into a dressing room it is difficult to avoid them. I did my best though. I managed to only look in the mirror for the 10 seconds it took to make sure the clothes that I managed to get over my hips weren't incredibly hideous. And boy was I in for a shock. Anorexics often have an extremely distorted body image and see themselves as fat when they are skeletal. I have the opposite of anorexia. In my mind I am much thinner that I am and boy was that mirror a shock. I had I don't know how many stomachs and chins. It made me want to head for the nearest Taco Bell and eat my sorrows away. But I figured that I better not since that was how I got into this mess in the first place. So I have started running again and trying to eat better. We'll see how long it lasts. This morning I was walking back from running around the park with the two corgis and I saw a guy on the side of the road smoking a cigarette and wearing a t-shirt that said GET HARD...STAY HARD. The price we women have to pay for looking good. Forget shin splints and muscle cramps...THAT was painful.